Figuring I’d eventually have no choice but to settle for my mother’s way of life, the disappointment began to show through my normally playful and flirtatious facade.
I began searching for a man to stimulate my mind, after all the failed attempts to find one to stimulate my body.
It was then that I first noticed you. Deeper, more insightful than even your closest friends gave you credit for. We could talk for hours about anything, or nothing and be content never laying a hand on one another.
If I’d known then what I know now, our relationship may have been a little faster in its development. I couldn’t now, looking back, tell you how long we spoke or typed one another before that first touch. I can; however, say that it was longer than it needed to be.
A simple hug. Two friends exchanging an embrace.
Your arms wrapped around me with such tenderness and care. Your hand trailed down my back and rested on the cheek of my ass, the sensation was like a breeze had blown across my skin. My body, almost instantly covered itself in goosebumps.
My mind spun for a moment, wondering how I had not even imagined that you could be a physical companion as well as an intellectual one.
I lingered in your arms longer than I had expected to. Even when your hands grabbed hold of my ass and squeezed, I didn’t seem to mind. Resting my head against your chest, for a moment I was home, completely at ease and serene.
The next I remember, because honestly I lost all sense of myself for a moment, you were teasing about it having been too long since you’d been with a woman. That, if I can remember your exact wording, you’d probably hurt the next one you were with.
In my mind, I was silently praying you’d attempt that with me. Hurt me, please.
But, having been no more than an inspirational supporter, I dared not voice such a desire. I was reluctantly happy to stay your friend.
It was shortly there after that a hug good-bye became a custom, more than a chance happening. Each embrace accompanied by a squeeze or a slap on my holiday ham sized ass cheeks.
I began to not only enjoy, but expect it. And it began to less surprise me, than turn me on. I began to wonder daily, what else those hands could do.
Our once silly, friendly, innocent gesture of displeasure, ( sticking our tongues out at one another) became just another peak in my curiosity, and to be honest made me hot.
Yet, I remained the always constant friend and confidant.
It was longer still before either of us breached the topic of physically entertaining one another. And it came with the promise that were we to try such a thing, we would remain as we always had been… friends first.
Plans were made, and at the appointed time I found myself in your driveway, more nervous than I’d ever been over a man.
You, as always, were so gentle with my emotions. Easing my fears with kind words, pure patience and delicate understanding.
Your mother must have taught you hospitality. I felt warm and welcome from the instant I crossed the threshold. You offered me a seat, asked if the current television channel was to my liking, even asked if I needed anything from your kitchen.
Looking into those big teddy bear eyes, as you attempted to please and impress me, I only wanted to kiss you.
Touching your face, I grazed your ear and saw your entire body react. Spot number one located. Leaning toward you, I touched your lips with a soft brush of mine. Every muscle in your body seemed to instantly relax.
Eyes closed, in an ever lasting moment, you held me to you, as if you were afraid when your eyes opened I’d be gone.
I lightly brushed another kiss across your lips, and your hold released, you gazed at me with new eyes. As if in that moment my mortal skin had lifted away, and you saw the angel in my soul looking back at you.
A new side of you followed suit.
You kissed me back, sweetly, passionately, as if I had been a gift hand delivered by God.
One hand began to trail down my back, as it did when we first embraced. Only, it did not stop at my ass this time. Sitting beside me on the edge of the sofa you slid it down the back of my leg, to behind my knee so my leg would elevate just enough to grant you access to where ever and what ever you wanted.
You grabbed my thigh, just above my knee and slid me away from the back of the sofa. Before I knew it, both your hands were at my waist.
With a grin and a kiss, you lifted me easily into the air and slid backward, bringing me down to straddle your lap.
These thick thighs had never been wrapped around you in any fashion, or manner. The initial experience had you momentarily mesmerized, seeing them spread so easily around your frame.
Arms wrapped around your neck, I wondered what might be running through that incredible mind of yours.
After a moment of stillness and silence, your hands slid back to their favorite spot, squeezing my ass cheeks, handfuls, and at your mercy.
“I’m speechless,”you said in simple honesty. “So many thoughts. So many desires. No words.”
The truth was, even though I loved your mind, and normally would crave the sound of your voice, and its comforting resonance, I , at this moment, wanted nothing more than to see you act. Take that mind, and words or not, act upon those desires.
“If I were anyone else, what would we be doing?” I asked in attempt to get the ball rolling.
“Momma, if you were anyone else, we wouldn’t be here. I had no desires to be with anyone, until your beautiful soul walked into my life. And now, I don’t ever want to spend a day without you in it.”
The blushing grin that painted itself across my face must have been huge. The way you say things, it makes my blood boil with passion, my mind spark with sentiment, and my body ache for anticipated pleasures. That and every time you called me momma, I wanted to treat you like the dirty little boy I secretly hoped you were under the intellectual friend I knew and admired.
“You sure know how to make me smile.” I said through the burning red I was now glowing.
“Promise not to think less of me,” you added inspiring me to raise an eyebrow.
“But, I know I can make you smile, I’m wondering if I can make you whimper, make you beg, make you squirm, and god willing make you squirt.”
Without hesitation I responded, “I volunteer for this mission of discovery.” And at realizing how it sounded let out a giggle in embarrassment at how eager I was.
Smiling back at me, you added, “Perhaps I should get a better idea of what I’m working with.”
Scooting backward off your lap and standing in front of you I asked, “How can I assist?”
Grabbing my belt you pulled me forward and between your legs that were parted where you sat.
“Part of me if afraid of you.” You offered up willingly.
The sentiment shocked me for a moment. “What do you mean?”
You slowly loosened the clasp on my belt. “You’re smart. You’re beautiful. Your opinion means the world to me, but I’m afraid of loosing control with you. I’m afraid the inner animal in me might get loose.”
“You are afraid of yourself when you are with me?” The idea wasn’t new to me. Many times I had heard people in relationships say they become someone, or something else when they are with someone they can not control their hunger for.
“I want you, all of you, But I don’t want to hurt you.” You admitted almost ashamed at your self diagnosed weakness.